Until Seth and then Elias came on to the scene I had always been the champion of the underdog. I still root for the underdog on the fields of play. I’ve been athletic and popular throughout my life, seemingly fitting in to many diverse groups. That may be because of my
political focus. But, I have always had a “thing” about protecting the underdog from mistreatment by the topdog.
Henry was a bespectacled eight-year-old introvert, who didn’t know the fat end of a bat from the grip. He was tormented constantly by the other kids. What made it worse for Henry was that no matter what anyone did or said to him, he never cried. No one could get Henry to shed a tear and I can tell you they tried quite hard. I wouldn’t hang out with Henry for fear of my own ostracism, but I was always friendly to him.
One day the boys in my class were playing stickball during recess on the P.S. #30’s asphalt playground. Henry was assigned the catcher’s position as this was the least glamorous of all the positions in our eight-year-old minds. (Right field is now the worst). One of the bigger boys came up to the plate and gave the broom handle bat a mighty swing. Henry was too close and caught the bat, not the ball, with the side of his head. The pain was enough to get Henry to loose a torrent of tears and off he ran into the school. While the other kids laughed, I ran after Henry and followed him into the boy’s lavatory. I didn’t do much, other than to check on him and tell him I was sorry he got hurt. I quickly left him and returned to the game.
The reason I bring this up is because it has been a pattern with me throughout my
life and therefore, I suspect, one of my
truths has lain hidden within these scenarios. In looking back on the myriad times I’ve attempted to soothe the underdog I realize that much of what was at work with me was my
empathic sense. I truly felt their emotional pain and in some sense I wanted it to go away. But, there is more. There is the truth that I am my brother’s keeper; that I must FIX. Every parent experiences it with their children and many folks fall into the category of the Good Samaritan. There is nothing wrong with being a Good Samaritan, but it is important to understand that being one is not a truth, but it is a truth for the one that holds it.
Let me back up a bit. I never tried to FIX the underdog, but on occasion I have tried to rescue them from the topdog. Both attempts – fixing and rescuing – is a form of
non-acceptance of both the underdog and myself. In attempting to fix and/or rescue I project an energy that discounts their ability to choose and create their own reality, and because I configure the underdog’s energy through my perception (he is my creation) I also discount myself. In my rescuing I project to the underdog that they are not creating their reality efficiently and that their
choice is unacceptable. This, again, is non-acceptance and says that I can create their reality better than they can.
Another way this rescuing behavior discounts myself is in my perception that I can’t create my reality the way I want. What I want is acceptance on the part of everyone. However, my self-worth and value are intrinsic to who I am. It is not earned. It comes into the world with me. I don’t need the underdog to make myself feel better about me, nor do I need the topdog to acknowledge me.
The Good Samaritan is a strong belief that resides within the
religious belief system. Intrinsically it is neither
good nor bad, even though our preferences attach “good” to the Good Samaritan. It is a belief that is deeply entrenched in the psyche of
The Forgotten Self. Many other beliefs glom on to it; beliefs such as we can
control some things, but not all things (victimization); that some people just can’t take care of themselves without help; think of others before yourself…. There are plenty of birds in the birdcage called religious beliefs.
This is not to say we should not
care, but how do we integrate caring with our need to fix and rescue. Fixing and rescuing is not a need, for we need nothing although we believe we need a lot. Fixing and rescuing is a preference and a choice; and for some it is a truth. There is nothing wrong with this as long as we understand that our truths are true for us, but not true for everyone. Couple that with the further understanding that the underdogs are not wrongly creating their own reality. They are creating within their own
Intent and
Value Fulfillment.
If my understanding of the Seth/Elias information is correct then I may have preferences that align with the Intent I brought with me into this reality. This intent may include exploring the concept of helping. The difference between
The Forgotten Self and the Remembered Self is that the Remembered Self understands that his
desire to help is a preference and a choice and as such is not an
absolute. That is to say that the ideal of the Good Samaritan is not a cosmic truth. We draw the underdogs to ourselves, just as the underdogs draw us to them, and we each do it for our own reasons.
(Remember my post on agreements?). So, if I offer a hungry person some food, I do it because I want to and not because the hungry person is a poor soul who needs me to survive. If I offer a heroin addict a rehab program I do it for me because it is my preference to do so. I offer the program with no
expectations regarding whether the addict will accept my offer or if he does I hold no expectations whether he will successfully complete the program. That would be his choice. Plain and simple; I just stop judging!
The underdog is no less nor is he any more than the topdog. Each is simply exploring physical reality in a different manner. There is also nothing wrong with the topdog who completely ignores the underdog. It is as important to
accept the topdog as it is to accept the underdog. No one needs fixing. No one needs rescuing.
Bill Marshall